How to Avoid Parent Goggles

After nearly 30 years of coaching and training basketball players, there’s one term you hear often in coaching circles:

Parent Goggles.

Parent goggles happen when parents love their child so much that they only see the positives — but struggle to see the areas their child still needs to improve.

This conversation isn’t about potential.

Every kid has potential.

This is about where a player is today.

Maybe a player needs to improve ball handling.

Maybe conditioning isn’t where it needs to be.

Maybe confidence or effort fluctuates.

That’s normal. Every athlete has weaknesses.

But growth only begins when we’re honest about them.

Why Coaches Have Tough Conversations

Coaches don’t give feedback to hurt feelings or discourage kids.

We do it to help them improve.

Just like in school — if a student struggles on a test, a teacher explains what needs work so the student can succeed next time. Sports work the same way.

Encouragement matters.

But honesty matters too.

The best environment for development includes both belief and accountability.

Teaching Kids to Love Feedback

In our program — and even with my own children — we teach athletes to learn something powerful:

Love constructive criticism.

It feels great to hear what you’re doing well.

But real improvement happens when athletes hear what needs work and attack it with effort and humility.

The truth is, most people avoid correction.

Elite players welcome it.

They love the work.

They trust the process.

They embrace the grind of getting better every day.

How to Avoid Parent Goggles

Take off parent goggles by being open to honest feedback from coaches and focusing on your child’s current habits and effort, not just their potential. The parents who help their kids grow the most are the ones who listen, support the work, and encourage improvement instead of defending weaknesses.

Because the goal isn’t just protecting confidence — it’s building athletes who are prepared, resilient, and constantly improving.